Business Coaching for The Professional (7 of 17) A Pleasing Personality

Introduction to the Series

Business fundamentals have been the same since the beginning of commerce. The true fundamentals are not anything you do; as some type of technique, although 'doing' is in the nature of a professional. The real fundamentals are who you are, and who you become.

Since I'm a big fan of series, I want to introduce you to 17 principles in developing unshakable character. These principles will contribute to great professional success.

The Greatest Benefit

In order to receive the greatest benefit from this series: after being introduced to the character or behavioral principles, think on paper of how you can apply it in your current environment.

Don't fall into the trap of 'I already do that.' evaluate how the principle can be used more in your life. The focus is 100% saturation of each principle before moving on. Aim to have congruence of character.

This is the Seventh Personal Principle:

Another mark of a professional is their pleasing personality. Although a lot can be said about different attributes that attract us to others; such as interpersonal communication skills, charisma, outgoing personality, consideration etc.. The key of having a pleasing personality is having high self-esteem.

We all have met individuals with low confidence and awkward habits. These are people we attempt to avoid or shrug off. These are individuals that don't recognize interpersonal hints very well, they stay way too long, and they make out of context remarks in conversations.

If we want to do business than we must be likable. People will do business with those they like. More importantly we must like ourselves. People will respond to us based on our deep rooted perception of ourselves. If we are convinced that everyone likes us and wants to be our friend we will create that experience. If we are overly sensitive of peoples responses and interpret their nuances as personal attacks, than we will respond in ways that warrant these type of emotions and behaviors. What we focus on will become our reality.

There are attributes in which I would like to mention. These are characteristics of high self-esteem, and they have a direct effect on our relationships. The key is if we act as though we have high self-esteem, we will grow our self-esteem and be more likable in the process.

Here are a few of My Thoughts:


Practice your listening skills. In relationships you must learn to listen and ask questions. In this situation you should give the other person the psychological air they need; which is to be listened to and to be understood.

Dress for Success

I am sure you have heard this statement all your life. Now is the time to live up to it. Dressing professionally has several benefits. First off, it brands you. Those who can give you a hand up will perceive you differently and in a positive light. Second, it builds self-esteem. Third, it will help you to take you seriously.

Practice Emotional and Social Intelligence:

Dr. Daniel Goleman:

Emotional intelligence

Emotional Intelligence is the capacity for recognising our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships.

Social intelligence

The ingredients of social intelligence as I see it can be organized into two broad categories: social awareness, what we sense about others—and social facility, what we then do with that awareness. Social awareness refers to a spectrum that runs from primal empathy (instantaneously sensing another’s inner state) to empathic accuracy (understanding her feelings and thoughts) to social cognition (“getting” complicated social situations). But simply sensing how another feels, or knowing what they think or intend, does not guarantee fruitful interactions. Social facility builds on social awareness to allow smooth, effective interactions.

Be Happy

No body wants to be around a doom and gloom person. Everyone of us wants to be around people who enjoy us and who love laughing with us.

Be Genuine:

Mean what you say, don't say something to placate or pacify.


Keep your word to others, do what you say you will do, and don't make excuses.

Learn to Apologize:

We want to be around people who are sorry for offending us or for not keeping their word. Know when you screw up and apologize.


Meet people on their level, don't be egotistical, don't think you are better than anyone else, but for the grace of God... The lack of humility is insecurity.

Be Polite

Watch your manners, no body wants to be around a brutish person.


Understand people are worthy of your very best, therefore serve them. Make a difference in someone's day. Do something special because you care.

Having your FREE evaluation with a business coach is a $500 value.

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